A Woman is no Man

Summary (from the publisher): In Brooklyn, eighteen-year-old Deya is starting to meet with suitors. Though she doesn’t want to get married, her grandparents give her no choice. History is repeating itself: Deya’s mother, Isra, also had no choice when she left Palestine as a teenager to marry Adam. Though Deya was raised to believe her parents died in a car accident, a secret note from a mysterious, yet familiar-looking woman makes Deya question everything she was told about her past. As the narrative alternates between the lives of Deya and Isra, she begins to understand the dark, complex secrets behind her fragile community.

Set in an America that may feel removed yet is all too close at hand, A Woman Is No Man is both a gripping page-turner and an intimate family portrait. Fans of The Kite Runner and Everything I Never Told You will be drawn to this powerful novel.

Review: I received an advance reader's edition of this novel from HarperCollins. 

Eighteen year-old Deya lives in Brooklyn, yet her life could not be more sheltered. Raised by her grandparents after her parents died in a car accident, Deya lives an incredibly closed off life in her Arab American family, which consists of her Islamic school and coming straight home afterwards. Now, her grandmother is pressuring her to meet with suitors for an arranged marriage, something her mother Isra was also pressured into as a young teenager in Palestine. A secret note from a stranger makes Deya start questioning both everything about her past but also what choices she has for her future. Told in alternating sections that focus on Deya and those of her mother Isra as a new bride and mother in New York, this novel illuminates one family's story as well as the cultural restrictions faced by Arab American women of Palestinian descent. 

A huge and oft repeated theme of this novel is the worthlessness of women, and specifically daughters, in comparison to men. Both Isra and Deya are raised with the understanding that men are the ones with choices and more freedom, to seek an education, a career, and a life outside the home. Isra's great tragedy, besides being born a woman herself, is failing to produce a son but instead giving birth to four daughters. Daughters are only good for housework until they are married off and sent to their husband's households to continue to work inside the home and hopefully bear sons. "A man is the only way up in this world, even though he'll climb a woman's back to get there" (76). In America, surrounded by conflicting values and cultures, this reality becomes increasingly untenable for the women in this story, as Isra and eventually Deya begin to realize that there are alternate routes and choices that can be made other than drudgery and childbearing. 

This was a fast paced read and I found that the alternating storylines worked well to build suspense and slowly unspool the story of the two main characters. It was also a tragic story of sexism, domestic abuse, alcoholism, depression, and loss. In short, the novel certainly does not paint Arab American families in a positive light. The only source of hope and joy for the women in this novel is reading, even as they are forced to secretly sneak books into their homes to enjoy. It did seem as if the ending was overly optimistic about choices available to Deya and women like her, but perhaps that is a realistic change in the cultural attitudes over time in America. This was a great read by a new author and sheds light on a community not frequently given a voice in fiction. 

Stars: 4