Tormented in a Privilged Life by Paulette Vargas

 

Summary (from the publisher): Paulette Vargas was born into a family of wealth and privilege, but the material affluence was only a facade obscuring the truth. From her father's hidden life as a closeted gay man to the concealed identity of her mother's father, Paulette grew up surrounded by secrecy. 

Review: Thank you to the author for a gifted, finished copy of this memoir!

This was an incredibly moving and sad story. The author was born into such luxury but despite it was often neglected and went without any sort of emotional stability or attention. She has had such a fascinating life with so many different chapters. I loved hearing the snippets about her family history, her grandparents, her time at summer camp, her college experiences, and her jobs as an adult. 

All four of her grandparents immigrated from Sweden. By the time her paternal grandfather died in 188, he was worth a reported $200 million. And yet his granddaughter Paulette went without electricity in her home for periods of time and at just 8 years old had to take care of herself and her sister largely by herself. I was very impressed by how good a student she was and how involved she was in school despite having no support at home.

This has absolutely beautiful family photos included throughout that added a lot to the story. 

I felt deep sadness for the author while reading this. Her life has had a lot of torment that largely feels needless. Her father was gay and closeted and clearly unhappy in his marriage. This caused a lot of pain amongst his family thanks to his behavior and acting out. I can sympathize a lot with this because I have a close family relative from the same generation as her father who went through the same and it has caused my family pain over the years.

My only real complaint with this book is I wanted so much more from it! It is a short at less than one hundred pages. I would have read whole books on multiple snippets she includes! For instance, her grandfather came to America with next to nothing, ended up founding hte Gust K. Newberg Construction Co. in Chicago and died a millionaire. Her mother believed her own father died when she was young but in reality, he had just left the family. I would have loved a lot more detail about these stories. I would have loved more details on her mother's accomplishments and education and on Vargas' own successful career as a relator and teacher. Also, one of her first jobs was as a Playboy Bunny! Absolutely fascinating and heartbreaking story and I would have loved to have seen this be a more full-length memoir so I could have learned yet more. 

Favorite quotes: 

"There are many unanswered questions, but at least I'm finally asking them."

"Every day isn't sunshine and roses, but now I can handle the darker days."

Stars: 4